Feeling guilty
Hello all,
Wasn't sure where to put this. I figured here would be best. My husband and I decided to do PGD/IVF, and the doctor is very cautious with his patients. (I guess he should be for his statistics and how much money it all costs). I have been on bed rest or semi bedrest since the beginning of Dec. I just feel so bad for Wyatt (my 2y/o with DMD). We did this so our next child would not be affected by this horrible disorder but it seems he is getting the shaft because he is being shuffled around to grandparents while his dad works and his mom lies on the sofa all day. I try as much as possible but to keep it normal but it is so hard, when he falls and I can't pick him up and comfort. Patrick and i just hate for him to leave, but his Mimi likes to take him to her house an hour away instead of staying here where he would be in his own home. He doesn't seem to mind leaving but I just feel we are pushing him off. I know it is all for the better, and he will have a sibling to play with in August but it is just so hard. Just need to get that out, thanks for listening---Jess
Wasn't sure where to put this. I figured here would be best. My husband and I decided to do PGD/IVF, and the doctor is very cautious with his patients. (I guess he should be for his statistics and how much money it all costs). I have been on bed rest or semi bedrest since the beginning of Dec. I just feel so bad for Wyatt (my 2y/o with DMD). We did this so our next child would not be affected by this horrible disorder but it seems he is getting the shaft because he is being shuffled around to grandparents while his dad works and his mom lies on the sofa all day. I try as much as possible but to keep it normal but it is so hard, when he falls and I can't pick him up and comfort. Patrick and i just hate for him to leave, but his Mimi likes to take him to her house an hour away instead of staying here where he would be in his own home. He doesn't seem to mind leaving but I just feel we are pushing him off. I know it is all for the better, and he will have a sibling to play with in August but it is just so hard. Just need to get that out, thanks for listening---Jess
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Lori Ware on
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Jessica,
I am sorry! You ARE doing the right thing..you know that! I am sure that Wyatt just thinks he is going to play! Are there any activities that you could do with him? finger painting, coloring, the fisher price kids game boy, wii, or something.. How long will you be on bed rest? Surely not your whole pregnancy????
know that in the long run, you are providing Wyatt with a longterm friend, confidant, advocate and helper. Hopefullly Wyatt won't need those things...but then again we all do from time to time...that is why we have each other!
Stay strong!
Lori
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Permalink Reply by Tanya Fleming on
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You have no reason to feel guilty, I would talk to Mimi about it and see if she could at least stay around your house some of the time, because of how you are feeling.
Could you please give me some information on the PGD/IVF, because I have a daughter that is a carrier, but still wants children one day and I would like to have all the information I can get on this procedure. What is involved and so fourth.
Thank you
Tanya
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Permalink Reply by Marian Lamberson on
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stay strong momma...you sound like you love Wyatt very much...and hey...i wish i could spend days on end with my mimi...your feeling guilty, but Wyatt is having grandma love everyday...no better recipee really....
Good luck and hope the rest of your pregnancy goes well..
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Permalink Reply by Erin on
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Jessica, I am so sorry you are on bedrest. I was on bedrest for 3 months before Nicholas. It was hard and I did not have another child. With my second pregnancy I had to take it easy and not pick Nicholas up or carry him. I felt guilty about this too. I have to say it did make him gain some independence. We also had to move him out of his crib into a toddler bed since I could no longer take him out.
I am praying you will not be on bedrest long. I would tell Mi MI how you feel and ask her to stay at your house a little more. I am glad Wyatt isn't minding going with her too much. Nicholas did bond with his Mi Mi before his sister came along. Give me a call if you need to vent. I know where you are coming from.
Erin
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Permalink Reply by Mindy on
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Hi Jessica,
I'm sorry that you're going through this. Is there something going on with the pregnancy that the doctor has ordered bedrest? It seems pretty darn conservative if nothing is wrong. Once you're pregnant, it shouldn't really make a difference whether it's an IVF baby or not. I had thought bedrest wasn't necessarily helpful in a normal pregnancy?
Take care,
Mindy
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